Friday, September 17, 2004

::Lost, Totally::

can say i've enjoyed today though i'm very very tired w/o sleepin the whole night tryin to rush my stuffs and *some things* happened tat reali put me off.. heres wad my astro says:

"Your strong opinions will be met with equally strong opposition today, LILIAN. While you may find yourself an advocate of the collective and the greater good, you may be running up against those who are rather self centered. Don't forget that it is more important to be happy than to be right. Don't let frustration consume you. Let people have their own opinions and don't judge them. Allow them to be who they want to be."
dunno why things turned out this way? i jus couldnt do things right.. not to everyone's likin.. yar i know, who can? but it seems like i'm in the wrong now.. WTH? i can dun gif it a damn lor.. but i reali felt very disturbed by it.. things change too sudden.. too fast tat i can hardly take a breath.. i'm feelin somethin.. suspectin somethin.. or maybe i'm thinkin far too much.. jus cant chase the thoughts outta my mind.. haiz.. SOMEONE TELL ME HOW??? sobs... wonder when will i break down man...

alrights.. here's somethin lighter.. was disappointed for a while when Auntie Fion said she couldnt attend class this mornin.. missed her man.. cos got nobody to disturb ma.. tat MY kept on sayin i mumbled to myself.. wadever i said to her she only shaked or nodded head and smiled.. entertainin me only lor.. but lucky i have her.. if not... haiz.. anyways, surprised to see Auntie Fion turned up in sch durin break time.. regret sayin i miss her though.. know wad she did? finished printin her stuffs liao still dowan return me the comp.. no manners.. i was playin FISHY halfway thru only lei.. in the end made me do nothin but disturb others.. failed to do so as WQ broke the highest score.. it was damn damn damn funny and noisy with us being in the lab.. laughed until i cried eh..

felt kinda blur and slow for the whole day.. brain not workin well w/o much sleep.. managed to focus for a while during AMBW.. but for the rest of the lectures.. sorry Jessie and Chow(like i know them very well).. its reali not my fault tat i din wanna pay attention.. i jus couldnt concentrate today.. or u can blame my Classmate(sudden change of nick) for being such a good influence.. slacked at mac together with Peggy and my Buddy(to follow the change).. 4 of us were like siao char bos.. laughin at all sorts of nonsense.. esp the *wall*.. *procure*.. 90% thingy.. and mayb the snapshot i took for my Classmate? haha.. poor Classmate.. victim of our brutal and vicious act.. now u know wad is pain le ma? :p

dunno whether i should bang the wall or not lor.. felt accomplished after completin the log book(at least i tried my best le).. but guess i deserved to be punished for being so lazy and last min lor.. have to meet up with Mrs Lee EVERY WEEK instead of once every 2 weeks for our FYP.. damn sianz.. got alot of things to do.. blame it on my stupidity for findin so much info.. haiz.. i reali hate group work.. felt like doin everythin on my own.. can i? its so difficult to please everyone.. i'm not feelin good either.. can someone jus understand how i feel??? sobs...

was home quite early today though.. long time nv eat dinner at home le(got EGGS=GOLD u know?).. my sista also said long time nv see me at home.. was so so so busy with schoolwork lor.. but anyway.. as usual.. was totally unconscious after my meal.. esp when i din sleep for the past 33hrs + after eatin so much.. finally blacked out on my long-time-nv-lie-until-so-shiok bed..

reali wish i can sleep forever and ever..

lian - hangin on..//

Posted by lilian at 11:59 PM